One obligation is then dropped and things are done better when they’re done the first time. That, for it gets worse rather than better. If we have something to do, we don’t question whether it is worth while; we just do it.

The reason we wast our time so willingly is that our ideas about usefulness were so limited. When someone with his nose to the grindstone tells us we needn’t bother to so such and such, we get the (alter-) impression that’s something might interest us. We study how not to stick to our work. Of course, we have too much to do, (studying being interrupted, we try first in copying over neatly the course,) to do everything, and if we can’t, then, as a last resort, we choose, so that two thousand people can swim at once. We do not determine where we go by where we’d like to go.

“What would please us the most?” just now. They suggest an innovation in toys. There again, what we find most pleasing is not limited (the way they were.) to any papers.

It takes time to find something you’re thinking of, but in the course things come up that one was not looking for. You might call living in chaos an exteriorization of the mind. It is as though the things in the room, in the world, in the woods, were the means of thinking.

In a grand sense, I do what you do and you do hat I do.

Thus it is economical for each one of us to be original. We get more done by not doing what someone else is doing. (This way we ca speed up history – we’re making.)

After all, we’re all the same species and we live on the same planet. And I am not who I was.

We are trying to go fast enough to catch up with ourselves. This helps to keep us ignorant of knowing where we are going.

Where do we go then? Do we turn around? Go back to the beginning and change everything? Or do we continue and give up what had seemed to be where we were going?

Well, I had no idea this was going to happen. I did have an idea something would happen. Ideas are one thing and is that what was meant by the Scripture, that we would be led by children?

(I asked the man at the toll booth what would be my best bet: If we are islands, he said just go straight ahead. I noted that the road shortly became very confusing. He said, do what is unnecessary.)

We take time, not and then, not to see what someone’s doing but what he did.

We see that to look at an object, a work of art, say, we have to see it as something happening, we are obliged to be able to go in all directions.

We don’t have to go anywhere: it comes to us.

Dropping everything and going is not as simple as it sounds. You find you forgot to go through your (silence) simple and quiet mind, that you failed to notice.

(We are doing only what is necessary.)

But here is a rub: that is only the case when somehow you’ve managed to drop everything.

We are losing our sense of values and we are getting increased awareness.

We are giving up pride and shame and getting interested in whatever comes our way or to which we get.

I was full of purpose. Ask me what it was and I couldn’t really tell you.

It is interesting when we hear that someone has traveled to a foreign country, on he was never in before. It is also interesting when we hear that someone has homes in various places all over the world.

And if we hear just static: it is a quiet readiness for whatever and the multiplicities are already in the making. We watch for signs and accept omens. Everything is an omen, so we continue doing and changing.

Do we have, if not ideas about what we’re doing, feelings about our actions, what we’ve made?

What is it that makes anyone say, “I can’t”? Busy doing something else? Shall we then find it a kind of hallucination which does not let us see clearly together?

Awareness and curiosity making our consciousness. We are glad to see that we are noticing what happens.

Asked what happened, we have to say we don’t know, or we could say we see more clearly but we can’t tell you what we see.

If we really did change, we shouldn’t have to bother about practicing. Of course, we’d gradually slip out of doing all the things we practiced. And then when we started going, it would be in a state of not knowing. We would be as interested as anybody else.

“Beware of setting out in search of something to tell you all of this: I am interesting”; and

“Beware of doing special things to make things more different than they are”;

“Beware in fact of the stop and start.”

What we need now is not indeed (disarmament and people marching in the streets but someone interested in modern art.) whether I’ll get there and whether the plans still hold and wether if they do  hold I’ll be able to get everything done that I have in mind to do.

This is our immediate and permanent condition and we just fail continually to notice it even when we think we agree. If, for instance, as may well have been the case, if someone procrastinated, then what?

Don’t I have eyes and a head and ears? They are not as good as they were (and also the metabolism) and perhaps they’re getting worse. We are (now told we are ) going mad. For instance: this needs to be aimless or you might say that is our aim.

It seems more like the something that could be done comes to our notice that somebody else did it before we (obliged to) did it. And generally speaking, it does come to our notice. A little bit of the scientific attitude, however, and you soon see that what was just done was not at all what was done before except as regards the general situation. There was, by way of example, a discontinuity of (thought, for instance,) particles, then there was emptiness (which now seems like a melody). Repetition?

What I assumed took place I looked for it in bookstores..

Is there a story in the fact (that we call someone to discover) that there is no answer?

And would you say such a story would be relevant or irrelevant to our subject: Was what I did interrupted by what happened? If so, it was not really doing.

And equally the other way: Does what I do interrupt the weather?

This is ridiculous, because the answer could be this or that and it could be refused or accepted by something no more solid than changes, very interesting changes.

He had done what he could to keep from getting in it. But once in the question arises:What keeps a story from becoming a subject and vice versa?

We cannot know whether we are continuing or whether shortly there’s going to be an interruption, after which we will pick up where we left off. We have a way of knowing but we are conscientiously not using it. We are not going to go on playing games, even if the rules are downright fascinating.

We require a situation more like it really is – no rules at all.

Only when we make them win our games. Do they then? I wonder.

We are learning to say, “I know.”

Another way to say is: We know perfectly well now that this has very much to do with everything else.

That seems gray, undifferentiated, and we inarticulate to seem to be boring. (“They are not boring but very interesting”) Everything is articulated.

There are temptations for us to stop what we’re doing and make a connection that will be overwhelming. But I’m losing my ability to make connections because the ones I do make so belittle the natural complexity. That is a kind of leaving in us. We are leaving our emotions where they are in each one of us.

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One is not trying to put his emotion in someone else.

We are what we are doing but where would we go if we abandoned something? We only have to change our means of measuring to see how close we are to what we are doing. It is not an object; it is a process and it will go on probably for some time. It is difficult to know whether we will ever forget..

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