phill pappas
intro’d to Phil in 2012..? via Alex via his first book.
excellent man. grazie.
his book – one page at a time
i feel as though everyone has some adhd (and all our labels to some degree, ie: introvert from reading cain), either that or i just happen to have everything in me.
excellent advice for meta learning
that charles phillips talks about as well.. in a great interview with uncollege
some of my favs from Phill:
take the helm of your own intellectual ship.
right now, ask yourself: what other things can i do? refrains from asking, what other things should i do? you should do whatever ti is that you can do, first.
on supposed tos .. and perhaps.. not even what you can do.. but what you can’t not do..
let’s do this first: free art-ists.
the freedom of self-control. knowing this feeling is pretty amazing
understanding why you do what you do can only lead to improvement
when you are trying to get things accomplished it is best to keep your mouth shut about it. don’t tell others. don’t even say it out loud. it has to do with feeling like you have accomplished something by simply saying it
please take care of yourself
athletics are fulfilling. you learn a lot about yourself when you push your mind and body. you learn how far you are willing to go, and how much pain you can take.
embrace your energy
energy\ness
people with adhd: the faster operating system of the human race, and society has simply refused to change for us.
adhd ness
(i’m really believing that all our labels, esp ones we label as disabled/dis\ordered et al, are really super powers. are we listening deeply enough to them? ie: carly, etc)
my productivity increase when by days are packed. i am always happier when i have more to do.
yeah.. get the book.. get one for a friend..
________
adding page while reading his second (?) book.. that’s dedicated to Alex..
@drawsalot
My brother @phillpappas book “When it all Went to Hell” is available FREE on Kindle for 3 more days, spread the word
Kindle version of #Whenitallwenttohell will be available for $0.00 March 1st-March 5th. That’s Free-ninety-nine. amazon.com/When-All-Went-…
notes/highlights..
after the show
loc 57 – because stetson created conflict, people reacted…. performers, readers, and other critics alike viewed stetson as a bully
loc 82 – with the influx of guests in to the theater, the temperature had spike causing the already plump and over-perspiring stetson to sweat more.
loc 127 – she recognized not a loss of innocence but an acceptance of cruelty
loc 152 – he was trying to bridge the chasm between the two iterations..
loc 163 – the school kids didn’t point or laugh at stetson after the incident. they saw the ball cap, and they knew what it meant. they hardly acknowledged stetson after the incident. they tried to ignore it and him.
loc 199 – this act of terror and our collective hatred for all types of isms. (court in play of looney toons et al – roadrunner tried as terrorist.. for blowing up piano daffy was playing)
isms – label s
loc 212 – bring these poisonous perpetrators of incredulous injustice for , ahh, for, until we have justice, lord, what choices will we have but to seek our own brand of justice. i say, i say, our own brand of justice.
just mercy ness
loc 224 – the coyote stood in front of bugs and began miming his closing argument..
loc 236 – the tunes had been unpredictable up to this point, and so they were threatening. when the audience has trouble following logically, they are at the mercy of the performance. their emotions exist to be manipulated.
the trick..was that they must not bewilder the audience, mustn’t confuse or confound. if they went too far, they’d lose their edge and slide into the idiotic waters of absurdity. real and unpredictable, that was how you got them.
loc 248 – argued the pros and cons of pursuing terrorism with military force – specifically, whether or not you could ever kill enough people to kill an idea completely.
dirty wars.. and starfish ness
loc 404 – two days later… the article started, when i attended the fifth grade.. people paid attention to stetson after that…
whoa Phill..
cocineros (cooks)
loc 634 – i think that the greatest lie ever told was that this country was about something other than making money, at all costs. … this country is about making f-ing money, and that’s all it’s about, making money and apparently war, never-ending war.’
during a convo on immigration and how hard it is to find/get work.. when there’s so much work to do
what’s really the problem ness..
rank (kills man while selling cookies..who had kidnapped daughter)
the meeting (principal and teacher meeting – talking about kids)
loc 1042 – seriously though, should we suspend the kid? pete, always a god consigliere, chimed in , ‘nehh, he’ll learn his lesson one way or another.
loc 1071 – because these kids gotta experience everything. you think i give a f if some kid can’t pass some rudimentary mathematics? hell, i can’t even pass rudimentary mathematics, and i don’t need to. i got some accountant quack that deals with all my finances. but let’s say that one of these kids keeps failing math class, doing real bad in all his classes. let’s say he walks into the art room one day and picks upa some clay, and he’s hooked. loves to do the pottery, and he’s pretty good too. well, if he keeps at it, he might be able to make a whole boatload of money off it, and then he can hire some accountant shmuck to deal with is finances too. and, mel, we ain’t taking that opportunity away from the kids. not here. not at columbus.’
let’s do this first: free art-ists.
the jade (neighbor with the blood infusions)
loc 1129 – and.. they grew silent again, and they allowed their minds to locate the stillness that existed in that moment.
quiet in a room.. still ness.. silence.. ness
the dhow (riding the boat w uptight ish friend)
loc 1352 – i said thanks to popeye for being patient, and he said no problem in swahili again (apparently nothing was a problem for anybody ever, it was crazy)
loc 1386 – every decision you’ve ever made has still led you here, with me. and regardless of what you think of men, we’re here, in this moment together. get it?
broken horses
oh my.
the adjustment bureaucracy
this section/chapter was so good Phill.
loc 1662 – but the reality was that great women often married defective men, and no one, including the agents at the bureau, could every explain why.
loc 1673 none of the agents at the agency had the slightest clue as to why ww3 was something that the higher-ups wanted, but, then again, none of the agents even bother to ask.
loc 1697 – i don’t know why an y of you are still referring to yourselves with your human names, but if you are you need to cut that shit out. right. now…. lannister looked at the agents in front of him. he shook his head in disapproving manner, like an equestrian’s father, expectant and disappointed regardless of any outcome. the agents held on to their human names, because it was all they had. they’d believed they wouldn’t been able to hold on to so much more…. ‘i need the level of professionalism around here to go up, okay?’ right now we’re here’ lannister said, holding his left hand at his waist, ‘and i need you here’ he moved his right hand just shy of his hairline. ‘understand?’… ‘yes, sire,’ the agents responded. …’take pride in your work.’ lannister said. ‘you are an integral part of-‘… bill finished lannister’s lines under his breath. ‘ an integral part of intricate plans, the plan, and we can’t do it without your absolute – ‘… ‘dedication,’ lannister finished.
loc 1712 – ‘sir, it might be easier to take pride in our work if we were given ample opportunities to actually do our work.’…’what’s that supposed to mean?’… eyes darted back and forth across the conference table-flashes of concern. curious agents wondered, ‘was this conversation actually going to happen right then and there?’…. ‘sir, i don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we spend the majority of our time either pushing paper, tracking down folders, or sitting in oversight meetings. i haven’t actually monitored a mark in , i don’t know how long. future projections? forget it,’ chaves said. ‘i haven’t got the time.’
too much ness..
loc 1727 – ‘enough shit. enough whining,’ lannister said. ‘this is how it’s’ done. this is the system, and it’s always been and it will always be. so, you need to… figure.. it.. out.’….heads hung. dejected. the sheap at the table nodded………..
loc 1741 – ‘there will be no more hunger..no more fighting. no more failed attempts at lid lifting… … ‘but does it work?’ cried a small and crippled raccoon from the crowd. .. ‘of course it works,’ fred yelled. … ‘prove it,’ the cripple aid….’ prove it, ‘ yelled another….’prove it. prove it,’ the raccoons chanted…. ‘i shall,’ fred said, flipping down the smell0met’s visor. ‘let it be so.’
loc 1754 – there were no agents present to witness these changes in crandorff’s folder. all of the agents were in meetings.
loc 1766 – ‘this is the update, sir.’…. ‘it’s the same as, ‘ lannister said. ‘look, you’re just telling me what you think if going to happen. but you need to f-ing convince me, per cy.’………. folder stipulation:…. although this regulation may seem petty, the agency cites the era known as the ‘dark ages’ as evidence for the efficacious nature of adopting said regulation. the agency must remain vigilant against losing or misplacing folders.
loc 1975 – what a waste of time, bill thought, all of it, another giant, pointless mess…….’the wheels keep spinning, ‘ bill said, ‘just a cog in the machine, where nothing matters.‘ …. and then he vanished. (that was his traveling haiku)
the will
loc 2029 – you could seriously get your fill at minimart these days. everything in bright, alluring wrappers as if the contents were case for celebration. the masses enjoyed the convenience of obesity. they enjoyed poisoning themselves, slowly, but in a socially acceptable manner, all the while growing bigger, growing weaker. this is a nation of molasses. i can’t stand it. i want them to keep eating. i want them to suffer from their unyielding penance
loc 2066 – after uncle rob died mom just shut down. she quit her job at the law firm, after thirty years, divorced dad, got a small apartment downtown, and just stopped taking care of herself, i guess. stopped living.
loc 2133 – i allowed my legs to go. i shifted my wight and fell back to the ground…. the pack enveloped my head, and at first there was quiet. but then all i could hear was the snow, pieces of snow, avalanches of microscopic proportions sliding and eventually settling next to my ears. finally there was silence, and the only feeling that cut through all that cold as the snow suspended me, weightless in my isolation , was warmth.
tetra (love/lose job, fish tank, trying out other people via their rooms)
loc 2152 – but, like my dad used to say, ‘nobody wants to get sent back down to the minors. nobody wants to ride that damn bus, again.’ i gave that place my identity, and, in turn, it gave me back something refined, something better, a version of myself that i’d been waiting for my entire life. and then i got fired.
earn a living ness
loc 2289 – it felt good to be someone else for a bit… as i lay there looking at the new space around me, i felt ok (like whatever had come over me couldn’t get through the frame of isis’s bedroom door)
loc 2323 – so i managed to heave myself out of my prison and venture into her realm of superficiality. try on her identity for size.
2 needs..
mental health ness..
a nother way
self talk as data.. as the day..
when it all went to hell
2362 – … that somehow i’m to blame for her insecurities. all because i glanced at another women….. i don’t know what to say. i don’t know how to just grab her by the shoulders and tell her that i love her, tell her that she’s my best friend, tell her how much she means to me, because if i had any idea how to do that, then i sure as hell would.…… ricky’s ability to focus on some inconsequential detail and convince herself that not only is that miniscule thing important but also that it’s a keystone to some arch supporting a conspiracy theory of hers, is uncanny.
our messed up communication – how to listen with your heart ness… danger single story ness et al..
loc 2388 – like when you see a woman suppressing ears, and a guy calls her cunt, and the woman storms off, and you’re watching the while thing unfold, and the only thought that comes into your head is, ‘oh, i wonder where they’s going?’… dense…airport dense..
how to be us.. how to get closer.. feedback loop is broken ness
loc 2401 – and here i am. three in the afternoon, …. drunk, walking through what seems to be a strange depiction of american life wherein everybody has some place to be, everybody really wants to get there, but they also have the time to buy crappy designer bullshit and eat slices of pizza, or calzones, or thai food, or some moist, then…… and stand in line as they pull out their phones and look like they’re doing something interesting, act as if they have something, anything important to do, when the sad reality of the situation is what they’re doing, all they’re doing is trying to avoid talking to anybody. avoid eye contact. eye contact leads to conversation, and conversation means that you have to try to listen , or at least act like you’re listening, or worse yet pretend that you care, that you give a f. eye contact leads to the possibility that you might have to talk to me.
communication.. 2 convos.. et al
loc 2413 – you think that’s why these people aren’t making eye contact? because they can tell that you’re drunk? no. they’re not making eye contact because they’re assholes. that’s why. it has nothing to do with you, you hardly exist to them, and they could care less that you’re here.
i know you ness..
________
find/follow Phill:
http://www.whenitallwenttohell.com/
be you. 