adding page day jon shared this oct 2020 guardian article on fb – how to stop interrupting and change the world – [https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/oct/24/let-me-finish-how-to-stop-interrupting-and-change-the-world]
you could mention just about any stubborn issue in your life and I would wonder whether you might have resolved it already had you not been interrupted so many times on the road to now.
willard heard law et al
Polarisation is not a result of disagreement. It is a result of disconnection. When we disconnect from each other, when we see each other no longer as human beings but as threats, we polarise. And the first, most forceful disconnector is interruption.
I have seen people stop that cycle (of disagreeing so then interrupting). I have seen them gather instead, determined to understand each other, not to convince each other. Crucially, they have arrived having promised to stop interrupting.
We think it is nearly always justified, and maybe even the very best thing that can happen at that moment. We think we are even saving time by knocking down the person talking while we hold forth.
First, we really need to understand that interrupting is a violent act. To begin with, we need to understand what interruption is. We have to recognise all of its pernicious and artful forms.
It is different because it requires a donning of humility, a rich regard for difference and for “other”. It is different because it upends the appearance of stability, because it wants to, and does, produce independent thinking. And so it is subversive. It is different because it requires us to stop wanting to impress and to start wanting to free. It changes what we call expertise. It changes what we charge for and pay for and what we reward. It can change our very purpose.
This felling begins by facing the emptiness of our excuses for interruption: “I must clarify; I must correct; I must look smart right now; I must enrich; I must follow my own curiosity; I know where you are going with this; I need to take you elsewhere; your unformed thought will be less valuable than my formed one; I am more important than you are; I look stupid not talking; no one needs to listen this long; you will never stop.”
Extracted from The Promise That Changes Everything: I Won’t Interrupt You by Nancy Kline
all the interrupt ing ness.. putting/keeping our lives/aliveness/fittingness on hold (ie: supposed to’s of school/work; any form of people telling other people what to do; voting; decision making; inspectors of inspectors; money – any form of measuring/accounting; all the red flags; all the irrelevant s; all the noise; all the distractions; et al) all violence on human being ness
begs a means to undo our hierarchical listening
listen deep.. to self/others/nature.. et al